Waiting

Here, I sit and wait for the phone to ring so I will know when I go in for PreOp testing. I need to vacuum and clean this place but I can't because I may not hear the phone. I hate this place messy !!!! I worked this weekend.. was not suppose to via Dr.'s orders but I could not and would not ruin the others weekend when we only have 4 of us and 2 working the weekends.. this way we all get 2 weekends off a month. Working keeps my mind off of me. Not sure how things will be when I have to be off. The girls are saying that they will pull my hours and not to worry. I hate them having to do this. I know this is the busiest time for us & with the 4Th of July weekend.. which I was supposed to work... things will be hectic. I told them that if they have to hire a replacement for me... I will understand.. they say NO... we will hold this job for you. If it gets too much for them... I don't want that but I do appreciate that they want me back. So I worry... each one of them already has 40 hours a week as it is.

The hospital that I have to go to is about 80 miles from here. Jessica is my ride back & forth. Her next vacation is not until July 8Th. She is Assistant Manager at Kohl's but she has a real bitch of a manager over her that is never understanding. Problems could be created. I worry.

My Grandkids are in tears.. because Jessica told them that if I feel too bad that I can not watch them . I don't want them upset and worrying.

Me, I have spells where I worry and cry and want to crawl in a hole and I try to occupy my mind and not read any medical info on the internet.

I like my doctor.. she seems nice enough. We laughed & joked some together. She has 10 operations already scheduled and she placed me as number 2 because number 1 must be done asap. She said that thing has to come of me asap because it is so huge. She has very well noticed that I hate to go to doctors.

My Mom and her crew have me declared almost dead. She is like talking to the Grim Reaper. I try to avoid her. My Sister and niece keep her informed that they have researched on the internet and have the facts.